Monday, April 11, 2005

A true sign of aging

Well it happened… I am faced finally with the inevitable proof that I am no longer the bright-eyed youth I used to be. No this realization did not manifest itself physically. It wasn’t an alien and intrusive gray hair, or a sharp arcing pain in the joints, neither was it the squinting and straining of the eyes to perceive that which was once clearly seen.

No. I got my ass whooped at JOUST. Yes, my favorite childhood video game, which I painstakingly mastered over endless hours while sitting in front of the family television. Once, I gracefully and effortlessly guided my pixilated avian steed high into the dark virtual air, soaring over my villainous opponents, righteously knocking them from off their foul vulture-like mounts with my gilded jousting lance, and in glorious victory I stalwartly swooped in to claim my enemy’s oviform prize. I faced down gigantic slavering pterodactyls terrorizing the vast expansive firmament and even thwarted the searing hatred of demons dwelling in their molten realms reaching out to pull those unwary souls down to burn forever in the scorching hellfire. With these halcyon memories forever emblazoned in my heart you can imagine my excitement when upon visiting a friend I discover amongst the game selection the very gem of my Atari experience. Well I loaded that puppy up grabbed the controller and prepared to unleash a little old-school shock-and-awe on all those lucky enough to witness 8-bit perfection!

Then the sky fell. No matter how hard or how often I pressed the button to flap my airborne ally’s wings it all came to naught as my evil opponents, time and again, removed me from my saddle, devoured me whole, or sent me spinning wildly out of control to fall and incinerate in the flame’s demonic grip! Valiantly I resisted, taking as many of my foes with me as I could, however, my Sisyphean situation turned to the utterly hopeless and I was forced to concede my harsh reality. With a sense of heavy resolution I exited the menu, placed the controller down, and turned off the game.

As the ancients noted “Sic Transit Gloria.” However, not all luster is found lacking and not all glories truly fade. So I am left not with a defeated sense of lost faculties but the affirmation that what once mattered so much, what was held so close to our hearts, that glittering precious brilliant thing that used to define us, does not fully measure the breadth of our existence.

But we’ll see what I have to say when my first gray hair appears to whisper softly of fleeting triumphs.

And after all, there’s always Ms. Pac-Man!



Blogger Kanokadafi said...

haha you has-been, get a psp and lay of that atari crap girlfriend.

11:38 AM  
Blogger Brad Millette said...

I realized I was getting older when someone told me The Goonies was "Before their time".

1:55 PM  
Blogger MCB said...

OW! That hurts.

But remember... Goonies never say DIE!


10:09 PM  

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